“I didn’t want to hang out with you because you were kind of a bummer to be around.”
I can feel the scar where those words stabbed into me ten years ago. I had gone through an awful season of depression and was finally coming out of the tunnel and into the light. I was at a place to start confronting everything that I didn’t have the energy or emotional stamina to deal with while enduring that dark night of the soul. So I asked my close friend, the friend that I had invested much into, why she bailed on me the night that we were supposed to go to a concert that I had been looking forward to seeing. Well, the day that she bailed, she told me that she’d rather watch TV with another friend instead of going to the concert that she had agreed to attend with me. She didn’t even bother to make up a good excuse. She just bailed for something and someone more appealing. The anger and hurt from that rejection was difficult enough. I still tried to make excuses for my friend though. Maybe she didn’t realize that I was going through a tough time. I’ve always been the steady one. Perhaps she couldn’t see past what I was supposed to be. After confronting with my question of why, I realized that she did know what was going on. And she didn’t care. It about sent me through the roof.